CLINTON ST. QUARTERLY AN INTERVIEW WITH TIM Recently I had'the good fortune to meet an intelligent, serious, and dedicated teenager. In every respect, except one, he seemed to be a typical American young person. Tim is gay and works on the staff of the Portland gay newspaper, The NW Fountain. Tim may be an example of the new gay person who wishes to be open about his identity yet is eager to be involved in the larger society. Anyone interested in the gay scene in the Pacific Northwest ought to check out The Fountain. The free monthly newspaper challenges and develops how gays think and feel about themselves. David Porter, the editor and publisher, deserves praise for his efforts. The April issue, the second anniversary one, promises to be special. Look for it! Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: "To Be It , Av a Walt Curtis Wait: Roots Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt Tim: Where did you grow up? I’m from Portland originally. I moved to Tacoma, invited by my older brother, who was 32. After I moved up there, he told me he was gay. He told me how it was, all these feelings he’d been having and shelving — through two wives and seven children. Good lord, what a sexy devil! He made me realize I ’d been having these same thoughts. Only I wouldn’t admit it to myself. When did you first feel that you were gay? The old shower room brought out a few aspects. I could never look forward. I’d look up, then I’d have to look down really fast. I was constantly fighting with my feelings, myself — You mean in junior high gym class? Yeah. Or just walking down the halls. 1 forced myself to be more vigorous in finding a girlfriend. That was the normal thing to do. Didn’t a teacher ever talk to you? Wasn’t there any discussion of sexual identity? No. I didn’t know what a gay person looked like. What does a gay person look like? People were called gay, and tripped down the stairs and stuff. You always heard about it, but you never saw it. So it was just kind of like being alone. When kids grow up, there is a certain amount of testing. A lot of joking. Among Northwest kids, as I remember — and they still do it, even in elementary school — kids will use words like “ faggot” or “ nigger.” They will call others these names, but they won’t really have any understanding of people who are gay or black. Oh yeah. They have their social hierarchies. Was your brother living in the gay c om m u n ity in Tacoma? He was really just “ coming ou t,” too. He’d had a few months’ head start at it, so he knew more than I did. Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: a high school friend and Tim (on the right) In working for the newspaper, you mainly deal with other gays? Yes. And I almost resent that. Being around gay people is just one side of the story. I’d like to be around more straights. Since we deal with gay people, it’s all I ever run into mostly. What have you learned working on the newspaper? You said you’ve gained some maturity. It was quite an opportunity. I ’m gaining a business mind, I guess. Before, 1 lived from day to day, working 9 to 5 in a restaurant. Here, I feel I can contribute something to the world — You are a good business person. You know how to talk to people. Are you kidding? I’m scared to death every minute! When people call, they don’t know. When I talk to someone important and there is a message to get out of them — I get all frustrated and nervous. My face is hot, my hands get cold and sweaty. But you’ve overcome that through experience? How long have you been working on the newspaper? Three months. Up until last week, I was still apologizing for answering the phone. People would ask, “ Is David [the editor] there?” I’d say, “ Well, uh—” I was afraid of making a fool of myself. One thing I thought about this interview was I didn’t want to use your last name. We’re simply discussing the condition of a young gay right now — one who is not neurotic. You seem to be ultranormal, and very mature. Super normal? Super norm! Wow! (laughter) Yes. 1 don’t know whether I’m dealing with my stereotypes, but given the stereotypes that people have of gays — you seem really comfortable with yourself. Coming Out Gay Youth Council Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: What does the term “ coming out” mean, for the straight readers? The realization that you have feelings to show for men. If you appreciate somebody — a man — then you can run up and 'hug him or kiss him. W ithou t worrying abou t somebody saying, “ Ah, look at those faggots!” Doesn’t the expression mean that a gay person has decided to show his or her true identity in public — in the gay community? Uh huh. But not necessarily screaming. I t’s the release of feelings — How did you feel coming out? Did you feel afraid? Proud? I went to Tacoma — on purpose — well, not at first, because I didn’t know I was gay. It was a great opportunity to adjust to being gay. When I came back to Portland — some of my friends and I parted ways. Others make their tacky little jokes, but we’re still friends! Unfortunately, there still is a great division between gays and straights. When you come out, you have to choose what part of society you’re going to be involved with. People are given that impression, but I don’t really think you should have to! Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: Walt: Tim: What is the Gay Youth Council? It’s a gathering of young gays to provide a growth opportunity for the entire community. We have rap groups, provided by the Men’s Resource Center. Brad Woodward (of Outside-ln and the Center) oversees the sessions. Some high-energy people are involved. What’s the ultimate goal of the council? The goal is to prepare the youth for being older, I guess. There are a lot of queens out there who still don’t know what’s going on — hopefully, when we take on responsibility, we’ll be able to handle it — and make some changes. Changes in what? In the way gays behave in the city? Mr. Groovy and the Empress contests, that kind of social scene? We’d like to change the image of the gay person. I mean, the straights think they’re a bunch of screamers and really nellie. Like the drag queens — they have their place. But people should realize that that’s not the only or the main picture of the gay person. Gay people are normal, too. Only recently, the United States has quit classifying a homosexual as a person who is mentally ill. continued 15
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