Wildlife Preserves IB PLAN senes Erotic activity involving ro bots Investigators had a plan. Dagwood unction attempts A sad end on Highway 30. (LADING BASEMtr GLASS SHELTER carefully quickly neighbor Bumstead. The incriminating photos. How could there be any doubt? . A family’s lonely vigil. Night aft’ night waiting for Herb to reappear intentional and Woodlee came to an unfortunate and grisly end in early September when Woodlee was found frozen to death along U.S. Highway 30 in a The story THE WAYNESVILLE, MISSOURI ZERO PROTEIN PLAN used r all, Try these other natural flavors! Moose Jam • Groundhog- Squirrel Chutney • And our Delicious Coyote Gelatin Desserts bizarre crimes Mischief in a Wiscon sin hobby store. Herb Woodlee had everything going for him — a lovely family, a fine home. After years of tinkering in the garage, his patented design for a mechanical elephant had just been licensed by General Motors, who planned to introduce the pachyderm in the fall to replace their faltering Oldsmobile line. So the entire neighborhood was shocked when, one Sunday morning in July, the police arrived at the Woodlee home and took him away. The charge: pounding 300 nails into the right front tire of a neighbor’s pickup truck. But by week’s end, when the police had finished their investigation, what might at If you like ’em on the hoof woo former teenage actress Sandra Dee, was immediately subdued by Miam; oolice and booked in ^nty Jail under t-* ' and a ^pRrontiff, reported^! iressed over unsuccessful KNIFE-WIELDING POPI LUNGES AT CROWD the Waynesville Plan, each spoonful you take actually reduces your carbohydrate intake. Through a patented process scientists call Reverse Causality you can gorge yourself to a slimmer, trimmer you! Send $3 for your free booklet. Eat Like a Pig You'll be glad you did. Woodlee’s patented pachyderm. It could have been his ticket to success. homemade rabbit costume. J According to a letter received । A shortly thereafter by his fam- v h f l ily, Woodlee had apparently I been hitchhiking home to face an uncertain legal and personal future. ■ - j making extravagant claims for one more miracle diet plan. And yet. when was the last time you tried a diet that guarantees that you can fill your body to the brim with unprocessed animal lard day in and day out while actually losing weight? That's right! Want to spend a weekend in front of the Philco eating Reddy Whip? No problem! Because with |ves, in a /our Thinking that . Woodlee might return to his home, police arranged an elaborate trap involving a duplicate of his house and plasterboard mockups of his Uncle Bob and Cousin Larry, whom he had not seen for some 20 years. Nevertheless, by month’s end, Woodlee was still missing without a trace. Police were baffled until late August, when Woodlee was spotted skiing with a companion in Sun Valley, Idaho, and later identified as the man who entered a Wisconsin hobby shop and wood- burned the name of a nationally known soul singer into a piece of plywood. WA YNESVILLE in 9 a rou n d these days. Lord knows you don't need another “expert" , ive tuipSEX PROBLEMS (Cont.) firemen are usually busy, polishing floors, washing pump trucks and the like, but early in the week they often jiave time free, so that may ke your best time too. malicious crushing of his son’s eyeglasses, rowboat bondage, and more. But if the case seemed strange enough during the trial, it took an even more bizarre twist the following week when Woodlee escaped from the Ohio State Men’s Correctional Facility by climbing down an oversized clothes-drying rack and flying off in a customized automobile registered to his Dr. Malone, uUUffBuIty in achieving orgasm is the most frequent complaint of female patients. Dr. Malone suggests that women are hesitant to pursue their own satisfaction during lovemaking because of culturally programmed inhibitions and a perceived obligation to tend to the needs of their mates first. “The desire to see to one’s husband’s satisfaction is, of course, important,” says Dr. Malone, “but too many women, struggling during lovemaking to achieve orgasm, become overcome with guilt and begin experiencing a strong desire to get up and press their husband’s suits or fry up some chicken. “In the long run this Continued on next page. FLORIDA — Pope John Paul, on the last leg of a 12-country tour, surprised the world today when, as his caravan rounded a corner near Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum, he unexpectedly threw off hi^Mdf hat and vestm^M^ into Woodlee in the act first have seemed like an ill- advised prank revealed itself as just the tip of an iceberg. When the case finally came to court, police presented photographs, many of them taken by Mr. Woodlee himself, implicating the mild- mannered family man in a EAT LARD AND LOSE WEIGHT With the There are a lot of "fad” diets goClinton St. Quarterly 25
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